Hang your Fixie in the rafters and cut the sleeves off your jean jacket.
This week it was brought to my attention on more than one occasion that if your employed in the "Action Sports Industry" your best bet for improving personal street cred is to go get yourself a nice new or gently used Sporty, have the shop install some multi piece bars, remove the front fender and your "chase the cool" is over until next season. Also if your line is experiencing tremendous sell through you could go as far as having your local chopper shop hard tail your new ride.
Always remember trade outs cut cost, practice your DMV course and this will all be over in a few months.
I can't believe I didn't see this coming, I really need to consult my trend forecaster more often.